


The First Doll

by wth_am_i_writing



Series: Descent [17]
Category: VIXX
Genre: Abuse, Angst, Blood, F/M, Fighting, Knifeplay, Magic, Masochism, POV Second Person, Sadism, Violence, Witchcraft, inspired by Voodoo Doll MV
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-15
Updated: 2018-12-15
Packaged: 2019-09-15 21:13:36
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,230
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16940835
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wth_am_i_writing/pseuds/wth_am_i_writing
Summary: You’d made five dolls to exact revenge, but you never thought you’d actually use them. But he was gone and you needed someone to do the dirty work for you.





	The First Doll

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted to Tumblr on January 31, 2014.
> 
> Original Author’s Note: Part of the Descent series of oneshots. This can probably be read on its own… It takes place quite a bit of time after the last fic in this series, and there’s several fuss I’d planned to write that come before this, but the inspiration for this fic kept bugging me to write it, so here it is. I actually really liked tapping back into the twisted plot that this series started out with. I don’t think N came off as fucked up as he was until now. At the same time I’m almost afraid I’ve lost N’s characteristics… hm… oh well. No warm fluffy feelings here. Hope you guys enjoy it~

You lovingly pet the doll in your hand as you tried to stop yourself from hyperventilating. Tears stung the corners of your eyes, but you suppressed the building sobs. Running your thumb over its button eyes, you tried to think about how different each of the five dolls you’d completed were, but your mind kept wandering away—wandering back to the other night. Suddenly overcome with anger, you squeezed the doll and threw it. If only its magic were bound to Hyuk.

The front door of the apartment opened, but you paid it no mind. The rustle of grocery bags and footsteps filled the air, but you had no interest in whatever N had brought home with him. Reaching forward, you pulled the spell book closer to you, managing to reign in your tears as you skimmed over the various ways to make the doll’s magic work. Keys clattered on the kitchenette counter, followed by more footsteps.

“You need to eat,” N said as he crouched down beside you. He held a wad of convenience store lunchbox rice in front of your face with poorly split disposable chopsticks.

“Not until you tell me what you found out today,” you mumbled, voice scratchy from a lack of fluids. N sighed, pulling the rice away and dropping it back in the lunchbox. He sat back on his butt and placed the lunchbox on the floor, resting the chopsticks over top.

“I called around home and no one’s seen him. None of our mutual friends have any idea where he could have gone. He’s not answering my calls either,” N said, staring at the doll you’d thrown across the floor.

That was it.

Hyuk was gone.

Disappeared with all his belongings without a trace.

You swallowed, pursing your lips as you started to fight back tears again. He hadn’t said anything to you. You knew things had been off when you last saw him, but you hadn’t expected this at all. It stung. It stung deeper than anything else in your life had.

“Now will you eat?” N asked, holding the rice out again.

“I’m not hungry,” you refused, shaking your head. N frowned, pressing the grains to your lips.

“It’s been two days and I haven’t seen you eat a thing since you walked in the door,” N pressed.

“Not until we find him,” you choked out, tears leaking down your cheeks as you pushed the chopsticks away.

“You’ll die before then at this rate,” N growled, grabbing your chin. He forced your mouth open and shoved the wad of rice in before forcing it close again. “Chew and swallow,” he commanded. You glared him but did as he said. As soon as it was down, he brought another load to your lips. You didn’t want to eat it. The idea of eating at all felt wrong. With Hyuk gone, you didn’t _care_ if you died.

Knocking the food away, you stood and walked over to the window. N sighed loudly in frustration, but you ignored him. You drew the curtain slightly and looked out at the evening sky.

“I _hate_ this,” N groaned. Suddenly his hand was on yours and you had to fight the urge not to strike him. “I _hate_ what this is doing to you.” His free hand tentatively touched your waist as he pressed his lips and nose into your hair. “Seeing how he’s so easily destroying you makes me want to destroy him. If he’s going to do this, he’s not worth it—“

“ _Shut up!_ ” you nearly screamed as you whirled around and slapped him. N stared off to the side, slack-jawed in shock. Shoving him away, you headed for the kitchenette. You slammed your hands on the counter and tried to reel in your emotions. What you needed at the moment was _clarity_.

“I can’t forgive him for this,” N hissed, the sound of his feet heavy as he crossed the apartment. He placed a hand on your shoulder, situating himself behind you again. You felt closed in, trapped by his body. “And you shouldn’t either.” You clenched your fists, nails scratching on the countertop as they curled in. N leaned in, breath hot on your ear as he spoke what had been on your mind all this time: “If you want him, we’ll find him and drag him back.”

You elbowed N in the stomach, causing him to stumble back. You turned around and struck him on the shoulder. He grabbed your shoulders and slammed you back against the counter. He stared deeply into your eyes, his intent unclear. But it didn’t matter. You wanted him off of you, so you raised you hand and started beating his side as you pressed back on his chest.

“I just want to be _alone_ right now,” you hissed. N released you, stumbling back as he tried to recover from the blows. He turned his back and retreated back to the spell book. While his back was turned, you quickly tugged the knife drawer open and selected the best cutting knife.

“This book, it’s something wicked, isn’t it?” N asked as he looked down at the book. “I get goose bumps whenever I’m around it. You’ve been obsessed with it ever since you brought it back.” You pushed off of the counter and slowly crossed the apartment. “This is how you’ve been planning to get revenge, is it?”

You frowned, gripping the knife in your hand tighter as you approached him. He was being incredibly annoying and you wished he’d just shut up and leave you in peace until you were ready to talk—or better yet, that he was still out searching. Stopping only centimeters behind him, you brought the knife to the nape of his long neck. He tensed under the feel of the blade but didn’t move.

“It’s better to leave that book alone,” you insisted as you slid the blade around to the front of his neck, just below his Adam’s apple. “You’re already tempting your fate enough as it is. _Kneel_.”

“Tempting my fate?” N asked as he sunk to his knees, voice shaking. You kept the blade steady against his neck as he lowed down. “I’m trying to _help_ you.”

“You’re a controlling _bastard_ that always wants his way,” you hissed, grabbing his hair with your free hand. You jerked it to the side, running the blade to his shoulder. “You can never keep your nose out of my business. You _never_ let me deal with things my own way. You wouldn’t even let me pursue Hyuk on my own.” Pressing down with the intent to cut, you pulled the knife back and tossed N to the floor. He hissed, hand flying up to his shoulder. When he pulled it away to look at it, it was covered in blood.

Placing your foot on his side, you forced him down onto his back. Keeping his hand over the wound, N stared up, a mixture of anger and fear filling his eyes. You kneeled down beside him, bringing the knife to his stomach. He tensed under the touch of the blade, breath picking up as he stared down at it. You pressed down, light enough to only cut his clothing, and dragged. Clenching his eyes shut, he gripped his shoulder tighter and swallowed. He shifted his legs up, drawing your attention down. The sound that spilled out of your lips was almost involuntary.

“You’re getting _hard_ aren’t you?” you laughed, pressing the knife down and slicing his skin just deep enough to draw blood. N hissed again, shifting his legs in an attempt to hide his almost full erection. The whole experience sent a wave of exhilaration through you that you hadn’t felt in a long time. “Ha! I knew that you liked it when I clawed open your back to the point you’d bleed, but I never expected _this_.”

You moved the knife slightly higher up his abdominals and cut him again, this time drawing a whimper from N’s lips. The way his expression had twisted made it unclear if he was suffering more from the wounds or his erection. Nevertheless, the thrill of having such a sway over him was almost incomprehensible but felt so right.

“Everything I’ve done has been to see you smile,” N moaned as you placed a third cut on his stomach.

“To see me smile? The way you’d hit me when I didn’t act like you wanted me to makes me wonder about that,” you spat as you sliced him again. N moaned, muscles twitching as you pulled the blade away. “It was so refreshing when I moved out because it meant that I was finally out from under your thumb.”

“I love you,” N cried with the fifth cut. You frowned at the words. “I love you, so I’ll do anything to see you smile. I’ll even offer you another man.”

“You’ll do anything for me?” you asked, wedging the knife back into one of the wounds. N hissed, muscles twitching. He was getting close to orgasm. “Really? Then give me your soul. Become my puppet.” You pulled the knife back and moved to straddle his hips. You leaned down, hovering just above his face as you pressed the blade back to his throat. You nudged his hand away from the cut on his shoulder and fingered it, drawing a delicious sound from his throat.

“If you want to give me everything, then I’ll _take it_ ,” you breathed hotly onto his lips, pressing you hips down to meet his and lightly grinding against him. N twitched below you, stifling a groan as his eyes shook in orgasm. “I’ll bind you to a doll and you can stay by my side forever.” You brushed your lips at the corner of his mouth, earning a whimper from him. “A little piece of me will always be in you and you in me. How does that sound?”

“Like heaven,” N gasped, still riding the high of his orgasm.

“But in exchange, you _have_ to find _him_ and bring him back to me.” Pulling your hand away from his shoulder wound, you cupped his chin, smearing blood on his cheek.

“ _Anything_ to see you smile.” You rewarded the words with a kiss. Before it could get too deep, you pulled away and started chanting. Power flowed through your body as N shook beneath you, nervousness overtaking his features. Sitting up slightly, you brought your hands to his wounds.

“Erase from him his plight today. May his wounds be my debt to pay,” you chanted. As N’s wounds began to heal, sharp throbbing pains began to grow in your shoulder and stomach. You swallowed, mentally steeling yourself against the pain. You’d suffered worse, but your starved state amplified the pain.

“It’s real,” N breathed, horrified at what you’d just done. You scoffed and leaned back down, pressing your lips to his ear as you caressed his neck.

“Our fates be intertwined, bodies bound but free in mind,” you whispered hotly into his ear. N tensed beneath you, his breathing suddenly becoming shallower. “A soul for a life, a life for a soul.” You shifted so you could look N in the eyes. He stared back, fearful of the situation. Leaning down, you pressed your lips to his in a shallow kiss. Before he could even react to the touch, you could feel warmth flowing into your body. As you pulled away, you quickly reached to your lips to capture his soul before it could float away.

N’s soul was a hazy orb. You could feel its warmth and presence, but it felt as if you could easily destroy by squeezing it, much like one would crush a dandelion.  Focusing on the man beyond your hands, you locked gazes with N’s dead stare. Everything had washed away from his expression, leaving him with a doll like mask more guarded and cold than any you’d ever seen on Leo. Closing your eyes and taking a deep, you stood up. Crouching down in front of the dolls, you picked up the one you’d decorated with N in mind. You brought the soul to the doll and began to chant again.

“A life for a doll, a doll for life. A servant to erase my strife.” With the spell completed, you were able to press the soul into the doll. The sensation of something being drawn out of your body washed over you, exaggerating the pain of the wounds you’d absorbed from N. Squeezing the doll, you propped yourself up with your free hand, trying to recover. It felt like a piece had been ripped from your body.

N gasped. His breath was shallow and heavy as he tried to adjust to his new circumstances. You glanced at him, but your vision shook. All your energy was quickly leaving you. Despite the dizziness, you pushed yourself up and ran your thumb across the doll’s button-eye. Flicking it in the stomach quickly confirmed the spell had worked—the hiss N made more than enough. You smiled bitterly. A soldier to fight for you. A doll to do whatever you wanted. My, had the tables turned.

“I’m your master now. My orders are absolute. Find _him_ and bring him back.” The words tasted bitter-sweet. You wouldn’t be satisfied until Hyuk was back in your arms.


End file.
